Expat Life

I've finally begun reading a book that has been in my reading list for a few years now; Norwegian By Night by Derek B. Miller. The author is actually an American man from Boston living in Oslo. Although it's a thriller, the expatriation of the main character is relatable. Sheldon Horowitz, a Marine, relocates to Oslo with his granddaughter, an American married to a Norwegian man. One particular quote, or paragraph rather, stood out to me, "Lars, being Lars, was overjoyed and encouraging and optimistic about her ability to adapt and join the pod. Norwegians, true to their nature, prefer to spawn in their own waters. Consequently Oslo is peopled by Norwegians married to a shadow population of displaced souls who all carry the look of tourists being led like children through the House of Wax."

According to Wikipedia 16.8% of Norway's population is made up of immigrants. Granted this number also includes children born to immigrants regardless of being born in Norway. It seems strange to label myself, an American, as an expatriate or an immigrant in Norway. Many times I don't feel like the label properly fits. Of course life is different, but for the most part Americans have no major issues adjusting compared to others who are displaced, for example, refugees or those from a totally different culture. This is apparent when us privileged Americans whine about the lack of Mexican food for example, compared to an immigrant who came to Norway fleeing their home country that has become a war zone whose only wish is to return home. I often feel both guilty for indulging in such a minor complaint in the grand scheme of things and grateful for being more or less a privileged Westerner when these complaints happen.

With the immigrant percentage being quite large it's easy to find a group of similar folks. Here in Skien, there are several of us Americans. We get together occasionally and share our struggles, our grumbles about what we don't like about life in Norway, and our enthusiasm for what we love. Being an immigrant means your friends in your new country become your family. You learn to have deeper friendships and hold them dearer. I would even argue that immigrants try to have closer and friendlier relationships with their children as they are your only blood relatives in your new country. I know I certainly do this. Partially because I know my girls are my only blood relatives and also because this is just how I am as a parent. This also falls under my observation that many of us start our families soon after marrying our Norwegian counterpart. I'm unsure if it's due to some underlying loneliness and the need for family, but perhaps that is one reason.

The Grumbles and The Perks

So what do we grumble about and what are we enthusiastic about as expats in Norway?

Language difficulties is one of the hardships of being an expat in Norway. Some have a knack for language and if you're one of these people then more power to you. Others, like myself, struggle with it. We feel like we're getting ahead and then our language skills plateau. Some are shy or self-conscious about their use of language. Some prefer to use their mother tongue in the home. Some want to communicate easily and fluently to others so they use their first language, their emotional language. These are all points that I can relate to well.

The job hunt. Many of us have higher education. If you're lucky, your education will be approved by NOKUT. My education was. Unfortunately, while I was on the job hunt, no one understood what I had a degree in. Fortunately, I eventually found a job I love. Many have to work in areas unrelated to their education or forego their education altogether. Not a pleasant thing when you're crushed under a mountain of student loan debt. My plan (which is subject to change at any given moment because that's life) is to take the Bergenstest or B2/C1 test next year and hopefully enroll in a college the following year so I can get an education in something very similar to what I already have an education in.

Also following the grump about job hunting and language difficulties, many stay home a prolonged period of time for these reasons. There is a reason why when applying to live in Norway the Norwegian who is supporting you must earn above a certain salary. For those of us who are here because of a spouse this can cause some hardships because you must depend on your spouse sometimes more than one wants, it creates a hole in one's resume, you may feel like it's taking much longer to be where you want to be in life and overall, it can be downright frustrating.

Limited handicap accessibility. While this is an issue that is improving, it could use some major work. In America, it is necessary to have disabled accessibility everywhere due to discrimination and of course, lawsuits. Here in Norway, many buildings are quite old and some have makeshift acceptability for those who are disabled. Newer buildings of course have elevators, ramps and easier mobility access. Lately, I went into a thrift store which had a large handicap sign in the front window, but only stairs leading to the entrance and no ramp. What is even the point? My chiropractor's office is another good example. It's on the 2nd floor of an old building with no elevator, only about 20 steep stair steps leading to the office.

Sometimes or maybe more than occasionally I may yammer on about some unimportant aspects of expat life. Off the top of my head there are a couple of things that are somewhat bothersome which I know I'm not the only one who has made note of. 1) Food. Or lack thereof rather. I would also add over-the-counter medication to this list as America has a large variety of readily available over-the-counter medications for whatever ails you. There's not a large variety of food and over-the-counter drugs, but hey, Norway has a population of 5 million versus America's 323 million. Makes sense. Plus there's the whole Norway not being exactly like America thing. Another good point. 2) Parking spaces. Nothing makes me miss the USofA more than either looking for an impossible parking space or trying to squeeze my car into an impossible parking space and/or someone taking up 2 parking spaces or parking crooked because you guessed it, the parking spaces are small and impossible. I will also add a Norwegian's inability to form a straight line into this category as well. Don't believe me, just go to any crowded fast food restaurant or grocery store check out. Chaos. Chaos everywhere. These are only minor issues I complain about and if I do complain about these things I don't really expect anyone to listen or to take me too seriously.

The Perks
The perks of living in Norway FAR FAR outweigh the difficulties in my opinion based on my own personal experience. I enjoy life here. I expect to live here the rest of my life. If I didn't have fond feelings towards this place I'd have major issues living here. Luckily things seem to be working out alright and for that I'm grateful.

• A great place to raise children. I feel more carefree and a sense of safety with my children being raised in Norway I otherwise wouldn't feel in America. Not that America is an unsafe place to raise children, but I have less worries about my children here. I feel like children in Norway get to stay innocent longer and have worry-free childhoods. With that being said, my stance on American vs. Norwegian teens is different. I will probably be stressed out of my gourd when my girls are teens.
  
• Low-cost education.
  
• Universal healthcare. This is a major one for me. The yearly limit for adults to spend on their health services and prescription medications is 2205 NOK or 270 USD in today's currency. After that everything is free. The downfall is that dental services aren't covered which can be extremely expensive, but no one in Norway has to worry about losing their home because they can't afford health care. Norwegians, please, please never take this for granted.
  
• Higher tolerance and acceptance of others.
  
• The best of both worlds. Having children who are half Norwegian and in my case, half American means they grow up learning 2 languages. Bilingual children are a major interest of mine and it is such a delight to be raising my children to learn 2 languages. My eldest daughter is fluent in both Norwegian and English. I only speak English to her and my husband speaks only Norwegian to her. Raising children in a multi-cultured household also means there is a lot of celebrating and incorporating both Norwegian and American holidays into our lives. We celebrate May 17th as the Norwegians do with cake, ice cream and watching the children's parade. We celebrate July 4th the best we can with American food (I always make root beer floats on this day), flying the American flag and inviting some of the local Americans over. It's illegal to shoot fireworks unless it's New Year's so we make do with sparklers. Next comes Halloween and we decorate our house the earliest in our neighborhood and the most elaborate. I don't let my young child dress as anything too scary, so we order our costumes online and I dress up with her. We have been cats, pigs, this year I will be a crazy cat lady and she will be a rainbow witch. We make fun Halloween foods together and I take her trick-or-treating around our neighborhood. Then we have Thanksgiving. I make a Thanksgiving dinner for our family and we sit down, give thanks and eat. Occasionally the local Americans will gather around and have an American Thanksgiving dinner. I'm usually at my most homesick around Thanksgiving. This year I considered taking a trip to the U.S. for Thanksgiving. After giving it some thought I decided having dinner with my husband and 2 girls is what I want more than anything. Our Christmas is a blend of Norwegian and American. I put up the tree early and it's plastic. We celebrate our Norwegian Christmas with presents and family dinner the evening of the 24th. On the morning of the 25th we wake up, my husband dresses as Santa and he hands us our Christmas stockings. "Santa" also fetches the creepy Elf on the Shelf at this time to take her away to the North Pole so it's a nice goodbye and my eldest daughter understands the elf is gone.
  
• Renewed Patriotism. Look around any displaced American's home and you will see decor supporting their homeland. American flags, state pride, and any trinket to remind them of their roots will be laid out on display. As an American abroad I feel a sense of pride for my homeland I otherwise had never felt before. I feel as if I am an ambassador for the country and need to shine the country in a good light. Especially in these times.
  
• Easy access to travel. By living here I've been able to travel to other places I otherwise would have only dreamed of.
  
• Maternity leave. I'm currently on maternity leave for nearly a year at 80% pay. I am thoroughly enjoying this time bonding with my new daughter. Again, Norwegians, please please never take this for granted.
  
• Environmentally friendly. It's considered odd to not recycle here. Electric cars are on the rise. 98% of energy used in Norway is renewable as hydropower is what is used.
  
• Oh, and that husband guy is pretty nice too! ;-) 

In the past 5 and a half years I've lived here these are the ups and downs I've experienced. Many days I feel like I'm in limbo. I love and miss my home country, but I see many odd things about it. I love my new country, but again, I see many odd things about it. I feel torn sometimes, and other times I feel like I don't 'belong' in either place, sometimes I feel like the U.S. has become too foreign for me, other times I feel like I'm too foreign for Norway, but this is also the price to pay for having two places on this earth to call home.